slightly left of center thoughts

April 12, 2007

I felt the earth shaking beneath my feet. The city breathes; I felt its quivering pants while I am caught up in my own quandary. Feeling dizzy, I thought, “How do I hail a cab in this torrential rain?”

I was standing wet beneath the MRT station, so hungry and in dire need of fresh air that I thought I was about to faint. But the fear of letting my brother down supplied a new surge of courage. Thus, braving the large pelts of rain, I went head-on towards the mass of vehicles and finally got us a taxi. In thirty minutes, we are safe and warm eating our buffet dinner while trying oh-so-hard to socialize with our distant city-folk cousins.

This is just one episode of my five-day break–a tiring respite yet respite nonetheless. Now I am back in front of my PC monitor, lazily thinking of what to think just to pique my mind. A curious thing, just when I can finally go back to my old self-centered introvert self, I suddenly miss the hubbub and commotion at my aunt’s cramped apartment. I miss that brief period when my attention was not on my priorities and myself but on the comfort of my frail lolo and lolas and on the sanity of all the people around me. It was a brief period that I held my moods in check, earnestly laughed out loud, laughed and smiled a lot, had my picture taken more often, wholeheartedly tried to be nice, and attempted to search for a potential crush but failed in this latter aspect. Overall, I can say that my summer vacation, albeit short and blotched by brief moments of self-doubt (charing!) and frustration, is worthy to be immortalized as a journal entry. After all, every new experience refreshes us with a renewed perspective, sense of self and understanding. In several ways, I believe that circumstances tested my limits.

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It was for my Uncle Nilo’s wedding that we travelled 400 kilometers from home to the nation’s capital; around 100 km. is badly paved road. My Uncle Nilo is the ideal bachelor—handsome, kind, soft-spoken, mild-mannered, uncomplicated, funny, and rich, err, financially stable. I haven’t seen him for quite a while. He’s been in Canada for over five years but I can never forget the time he gave me P500 before I entered university. Back then, P500 was a big thing. But it was his acts of kindness–like giving me the pair of earrings he got for free from a mall promo, dunno if he still remembers–that made him more endearing. No, we were never close, but I guess he is that adult figure in my life that I never really got to know well nor spent considerable time with but will always remember with admiration. Thus, Uncle Nilo’s wedding was worth all the haste, the shouting sprees, the sweltering heat of the Metro and that rainy night when I blindly searched for a taxi…I need not state out loud that am happy for Aunty Karen and glad that they’ve found each other (thanks to modern communication technology!)

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By the way, today is ma’s birthday.

~ by frozenmocha on April 12, 2007.